What Makes Up Emotional Intelligence?

Emotional Intelligence is the ability to recognize, understand, and manage both your own emotions and the emotions of those around you.

Inc. Magazine posted a video that breaks down major elements of our emotional intelligence as humans.

Here’s a link to the video:


… and here it is on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/feed/update/urn:li:activity:6382244178113368065

Emotional Intelligence involves 5 major elements (largely quoting from the video):

  • Self-Awarenes
    • Defined: Knowing how you feel, and how others feel around you
    • How to exercise it:
      • Journal!
      • Review your journal to verify your actions and feelings.
  • Self-Regulation
    • Defined: How well you can keep your emotions balanced
    • How to exercise it:
      • Hold yourself accountable.
      • Consider times of self contemplation, meditation, and/or prayer
  • Motivation
    • Defined: A passion to achieve inner goals
    • How to exercise it:
      • Evaluation (measure) your happiness.
      • Decide to be positive!
  • Empathy
    • Defined: Understanding the emotions of others
    • How to exercise it:
      • Observe how others respond
      • Place yourself in their situation
  • Social Skills
    • Defined: The ability to interact with others and resolve conflicts respectfully
    • How to exercise it:
      • Give others praise.
      • Be open to good and bad news.
      • Try to be a good listener.

Depending on personality and upbringing, we are each going to have strengths and weakness in these five areas; however, it’s important to honestly consider where we are so we can know how best to grow. Here’s how I would grade myself at the moment (1-5, 5 being the best):

  • Self-Awareness – 4
  • Self-Regulation – 2 (It’s been a rough several weeks, so I know I’ve got to work on this one!)
  • Motivation – 3 (Unfortunately, self-regulation is impacting motivation, some.)
  • Empathy – 4
  • Social Skills – 4

Well, there’s my assessment as it stands today. Thankfully, at least, self-awareness is high. I could verify the results by asking several close friends to give candid scores, too. Iron sharpens iron, so if we are not willing to get this type of input it may signal a need to lower the score for self-awareness. 🙂

So, where are you after quizzing yourself? Now, think through ways you can begin to grow your emotional intelligence! Claiming responsibility for our own actions is huge when it comes to success. Start with what you can change—YOU! The stronger your emotional intelligence the more you can achieve by connecting and influencing others.



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